A Cord of Three Strands

My husband and I are celebrating our fourth wedding anniversary today! We’ve seen God’s faithfulness in our marriage all these years and we are so grateful because He first loved us, otherwise we wouldn’t know how to love.

As I look back, I see areas where God grew me through my marriage. In today’s blog, I would like to share four important lessons I’ve learned in my four years of marriage.

1. Submit to your husband.
I have been working in Thailand for seven years before my husband and I got married. After our wedding, we had to make a decision where to live and start a family. I wanted him to come to Thailand and stay there with me for a couple of years more and he wanted us to live in either his home country or mine. I wanted to stay in my comfort zone and was so scared of the changes I was about to face so I insisted on staying in Asia. I had a well-paid job and so many wonderful friends there. But then God reminded me of the vow I made.

“Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord.” (Ephesians 5:22)

And so I prayed and surrendered my fears to God and entrusted my future to Him as I agreed to move to Eastern Europe. Upon my move, I immediately got a job in the capital city, found a community of faith that became our lifeline  and made new friends who supported us wholeheartedly. I believe that submitting to my husband is submitting to God who gave him to me.

2. Don’t go to bed angry.

“In your anger do not sin. Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry” (Ephesians 4:26)

One of my weaknesses is my bad temper and it’s something I’m still working on and asking for God’s grace everyday. I’m just so grateful that God gave me such a patient, understanding and humble husband who loves me even when I’m at my worst. Whenever we argue about something, he is often the first to apologize and puts this verse into action. I, on the other hand takes time to “lick my wound” and sometimes it takes a while. And so the result is that he is a happier person than I am. I’m still a work in progress but because of my husband’s example, I believe that I’m learning more and more in this area.

3. Pray together especially when you don’t feel like it.

“Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.” (Ecclesiastes 4:12)

We believe that God is the author of our marriage. It is a covenant not just with one another but with God. He is the third strand that is intertwined in our cord so it is not quickly broken. I noticed that the more frequent we pray together, the more intimate we are but whenever we let days pass without praying together, we easily get irritated with each other (at least I know it’s true for me). We have innumerable answered prayers and we believe in the power of a faith-filled prayer. That it is what brought us together and is keeping us together.

4. Love is an action, not a feeling.

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. ( 1 Corinthians 13: 4-7)

My husband often reminds me of this. That regardless of how he feels, he makes a decision to love me. And I see him prove his word during the days when I am so unlovable. Indeed, the verse above tells us what love does and my husband is both my role model and teacher. Love is indeed what we do and not just what we feel. It is my desire to grow in love the way the Scriptures describe but I know it’s only by God’s grace that I can do so. May God help as I commit to love more than words and feelings.

I still have so much to learn but I’m grateful for these invaluable lessons God has taught me so far through my marriage. The best is yet to come.

9 thoughts on “A Cord of Three Strands

  1. You have a great start on your marriage, Congratulations on 4 years. We are going on 44 here and have not had a bad year marriage wise. In the storms of life that are bigger than us two cords are not enough. That 3rd cord will hold us anywhere, anytime,, through anything, every time. Beautiful couple!!

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s